Part 1 The Trip:

We departed Spokane, Wa at 7:00am on Delta airlines, right on time, enroute to Salt Lake City. Arrived in SLC on time, and figured to be in Las Vegas by noon. Not to be....

The plane boarded on time, and we taxied out to the runway, when the PA system activated. "Good morning ladies and gentleman. This is Capt. Ace Aviator, your pilot. On behalf of the crew of Delta Flight Going Nowhere Fast, I'd like to welcome you aboard. We're #1 in the slot for take off and should be underway in just a few minutes".... click the PA goes off.

Now we sit there for about 20 minutes. I've flown enough to know that the #1 in the slot for take off aircraft doesn't wait 20 minutes. Next thing I know...click..."Uh, ladies and gentleman, this is Capt. Aviator again. We have a slight problem that can't be cleared up here on the Flight Deck, so we're going to head back to the gate to let Maintenance take a look."... Ace then begins to explain the problem, referring to something called a Head Pressure Indicator. So back to the gate we go.

Once back at the gate, Capt. Ace gets back on the PA... "OK folks, maintenance is on board and are looking at the problem. The Chief says we may only need to realign the Head Pressure Indicators RVC and we'll be good to go"...... Now I'm getting worried. First, we changed from ladies and gentleman to folks. So now we are no longer passengers, we're part of the family. It's always easier to break bad news to family. And 2, he is throwing more pilot lingo out, knowing full well we have no idea in the world what he's talking about, but it helps reassure us he knows a lot of pilot lingo, which is a good thing.

Now, (and this is NO LIE..... ) Almost an hour of sitting there and again the PA...click.... "This is Capt. Aviator again. Well good news folks, we almost have the problem fixed. But I've just been advised a passenger has left the aircraft, so we will have to wait till he is found, should only be a few more minutes.... " click....

HUH?

A passenger has left the aircraft? Let me see if I got this straight... We're back at the gate. The door is open to allow The Chief and his maintenance crew on board and someone just gets up and wanders OUT the open door, and NO ONE sees this? What are all the Flight Attendants doing? Holding the maintenance manual for the Chief?

(Note to Delta Management: When the door is open at the gate, post someone to guard it to make sure passengers don't wander off the aircraft.)

A short time later Ace is back. Click "Good news folks.... The problem is fixed. As soon as we get the log book signed off, we'll be on our way..." click.

No mention of the wayward passenger. I'm not gonna ask anyone. I'm hoping in all the confusion of realigning the Head Pressure Indicators RVC, they forgot they are light one passenger. And why should 150 people have to wait for the crew to find one dummy who can't keep his butt in the seat like he was told to do. Frankly though I think the wandering passenger was just a cover story to buy them a little time. Anyway, we roll back from the gate and start to taxi. They make us watch the flight safety movie for a 2nd time, even though we saw it only a hour before. FAA regulations clearly state the movie must be shown before each take off, and technically, this is the 2nd take off for this flight.

Click... "Uh folks, bad news..." I'm really starting to dislike Ace. "The HPI came back on" (or maybe it went off, I'm not sure of the proper status of a Head Pressure Indicator.).... "We'll have to go back to the gate and let maintenance take another look.... " click..

Now, being the experienced air traveler that I am, I know that a 2nd trip back to the gate does not bode well for the passengers of Delta Airlines flight Going Nowhere Fast, non-stop service to Las Vegas, Nevada.

Back we come. After about another hour, during which they had to turn off the a/c cells for maintenance, click " Ladies and Gentleman, this is Capt. Aviator again. " Back to ladies and gentleman, bad sign, "I have decided to cancel this flight. We have Delta reps waiting at the boarding gate to re-route you all and get you to Las Vegas..... We're terribly sorry for the inconvenience".... blah blah blah.... I didn't really listen to the rest, since I knew it was not going to be anything I was likely to want to hear....

Gather up all our stuff and troop off the plane. Now, to their credit, they had a bunch of those Club Cars waiting, to take the bulk of the passengers to the main Delta Check In counters, where more agents were available to handle them.

What surprised me though was the speed at which Delta was moving on this. In just the 5 minutes from the time Capt. Ace canceled the flight, and we got off, they had a print out of the new flight plans for every single passenger.

I decided to stay close to the gate counter. A Delta rep was working the line. He asked each passenger their name and then told them what arrangements Delta had made for them. I heard a lot of passengers ahead of me in line being told they would be staying in SLC until the next available flight, which was not until 10:00 pm that night. It was now about 3:00 pm. These passengers were all given $6.00 dinner vouchers, good for any dining establishment in the airport. Of course in most airports, a stale cheese sandwich can set you back 6 bucks.

When he got to me, I gave him my name, then held my breath awaiting to hear my fate......

"Ok, Mr. Kamer. Your booked on Delta flight See The West, departing in 1 hour for San Francisco. You'll arrive at 4:00 pm and then change to National Airlines flight We'll Get You There Come Hell Or High Water to Las Vegas, arriving at 6:00 pm....."

YES!!!! I may be going in the direct opposite direction, but at least I'm moving. Beats the hell out of sitting in an airport for the next 7 hours.....

We leave SLC on time, and arrive in San Francisco on time. Get on board National Airlines flight We'll Get You There Come Hell Or High Water and even that leaves on time. We arrive in Las Vegas a little after 6:00 pm, or in other words, a little over 6 hours late.

I buy a ticket for one of the airport shuttle buses to take us to the casino, and even that turned into an adventure ride. First, we sit on the bus for about 30 minutes waiting for more passengers to show up. Finally the driver decides this is all he's going to get, so he jumps in.

I think he was an ex Iranian suicide bomber looking for Allah's unlisted phone number..... My first clue should have been when the gal selling tickets tried to get me to sign a liability release. He took the infamous "tunnel" route. We hit Mach 3 by the 2nd speed bump at the airport, and only went sub-sonic when we got to Treasure Island. We dropped a few passengers off at TI (who immediately dropped down and kissed the ground) and he started to pull out. All of a sudden he hits the brakes, backs up at break neck speed (is there any other kind) and parks. He gets out saying "I be right back", and ducks into the casino. As I was just about to mutiny and take command of the bus, he's back, and asks me we're I'm going.... "To the Imperial Palace" I tell him....

"Yes, I remember", he tells me. If he remembered why did he have to ask... But I decided not to annoy him, since he still had to make it across Las Vegas Blvd. and I was sitting on the oncoming traffic side of the bus....

Amid honking horns, squealing tires and the delightful smell of burning brake pads, we arrived!

Walked in the front door of the casino at about 7:30pm....

Part 2: The Hotel  follows

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